Addict to Reality (TV)

As many of you know, I have a horrible addiction - to reality TV. Most of the obsession is centered on "high brow" series like Amazing Race, Survivor and Project Runway, but I have sunk to such levels as MTV's 8th & Ocean and the the Janice Dickinson Modeling Agency on Oxygen. ouch. I have tried many things, including law school, in an attempt to break the habit. It only got worse with Tivo, oh I miss you Tivo. Travis, I hope you are giving her a good home.

It looked like my year in American Samoa might be the detox I needed to cure me of this horrible affliction. Am. Sam. does have Cable TV, but like all things Am. Sam. it is totally random. Am. Sam. Cable provides about 20 stations, but they are on a two week delay. It appears that someone records Cable TV in San Fransisco (in the last month they started taping TV in Hawaii) and sends it to Am. Sam. I am still wondering about the copyright issues as well as the poor guy recording all of this TV. The delay includes the local news. random. I also learned that the Cable company is out of cable converters, so even if I wanted to get Cable (on my 13 inch TV), I was unable to get it. Okay, looks like my addiction might be cured.

But like any good addict, I looked for other sources. I turned to the fine TV companies that air the wonderful shows. This avenue looked very promising because more and more stations are creating streaming video broadband sites where one can watch these programs through the Internet. While the Internet here is one step above dial-up (a very small step at that), it still looked like it might work. Sadly, the TV executives never got a copy of the Treaty of Cession between Samoa and the United States clearly stating that the Samoa is part of the United States - hence the American of American Samoa. Wrongly believing that we are not part of the United States, these "bastard people" (please see movie Waiting for Guffman to fully enjoy phrase) have blocked the broadcast of these quality shows to areas "outside the United States" - fine, be that way. Strike Two - perhaps I will finally be cured? So help me if Guam gets US TV over the Internet, damn you Guam! I am still drafting my strongly worded letter to the executives of ABC to broadcast Dancing with the Stars over the Internet in Samoa. Here is a clip from my phone call to FOX in attempt to get Nanny 911 in Samoa.

I began to go underground - due to the dial-up nature of our Internet connection, it would take close to five hours to download a TV show through the peer to peer networks. I first thought about it, but realized that even that was a bit extreme for me. I think I am really growing here in Am. Sam. Then I found the motherload - Youtube.com. For those not "hip" to the latest Internet fad, it is a site where people can post short videos. Some people have a lot of free time, cause some of the stuff on this site is just plain weird.
I told you. However, in addition to the random videos, some very, very wise people have decided to post TV shows. The withdraw pains disappeared, sweet, sweet medicine. I have been able to keep up to date with the Amazing Race, Survivor and America's Next Top Model. As a bonus, new episodes of Lost are also being posted. While watching a show in nine minute segments, and sometimes having to wait for it to load can be annoying, it is still totally worth it.

I am still having trouble finding my MTV shows, where are you Laguna Beach!?!, but I am keeping the faith. I still have hope that someday I will beat this addiction, but realized that going cold turkey was not the right method for me.